They are insane

My favorite question people ask is "Of all the places you have visited, which one has the worst living conditions?" On one hand I cannot complain about having the best job of anybody out here (it really is). Or that it actually makes sense to spend money taking care of places that are more mission essential. But it is also quite entertaining to compare our home with living on mars.

We have quite possibly the worst stretch of road of any other place in the world. I have thought about making a diagram that compares the cost of replacing vehicle suspension versus filling the crater-like potholes that would probably make Neil Armstrong feel right at home. And yet there is a bulldozer, excavator, dumptruck and steamroller hard at work sitting in a parking lot.

We have some (er had) covers for the lights. They are so old that they have become grumpy, crusty and senile and lie in wait for some unsuspecting passerby to fall and smash into pieces over (all of our office grumps have dispatched themselves, the hallways are still waiting, so beware).

And I won't even bother with a burnt out lightbulb anymore. I believe you may need a letter from a Congressman to get a replacement, not sure though, it may need to be from the Secretary of State.

I have not been briefed on the rules for the game yet but I am working hard at figuring it out. So far I know this much:

-When approaching a sidewalk you do not have the right of way.

-Walking faster than the approaching pedestrian, even if it is a significant speed difference, does not mean you have the right of way.

-If driving a car you do not have the right of way.

-If someone else is driving in a car towards you, you do not have the right of way.

-If you are carrying a full backpack and boxes and obviously struggling, you do not have the right of way.

-If you are walking on the main road and someone approaches from the side you do not have the right of way.

-If you are on the left you do not have the right of way.

-If you are on the right you do not have the right of way.

-If you are on the far left side of a 30+ wide stretch of road carrying boxes and backpacks and obviously struggling and there are no other vehicles or pedestrians on the road and a car approaches you must walk off of the road to avoid being hit because you do not have the right of way.

-If you see a group of people walking at about .1 miles per hour stacked 7 people taking up the entire width of walkway and you are approaching from either direction you do not have the right of way.

-But I digress.

Lastly, and this is still making my brain hurt just thinking about it, somehow, inconceivably, an email doesn't constitute communication. I don't know how it works, maybe if I spell it out you can help. Here is how the conversation played out...

A: Where are you guys?

B: We are at Stone.

A: You are not at Shindand?

B: No.

A: Why not?

B: I told you already in an email.

A: You are going to take a plane from Shindand to Arena.

B: We are at Stone.

A: You must take the plane.

B: Did you get the email that we are at Stone.

A: Yes. You need to take the flight from Shindand to Arena.

B: We are at Stone, not Shindand.

A: But you didn't tell me that.

B: What?

Welcome to Mars.